Three weeks.

That's how long the doctors say my aunt Brenda (previously mentioned here) has to live.

Her cervical cancer has spread all over her body. The whole family was over at the hospice this weekend. She couldn't keep her eyes open for a full minute.

The Bills - one's the husband, the other is their son - are in denial over the whole thing. My dad speculates that the elder will probably die shortly afterwards of heartbreak. Unlike my grandparents, they were very dependent on each other.

When I was much younger, I loved going down to their house. It was a long, weary trip, but hell, they had a pool. And Billy had all those great Star Wars toys, and a BB gun that he'd let me shoot once in a while. Storm Troopers were often used as targets.

None survived.

We'd spin around on his go-cart, or sledding down the hill behind their house. We had awesome escalating water fights that would make Buster & Babs Bunny proud. I idolized the guy. He was the only male relative close to my age in the state. He's five or so years older than me, so when he hit his late teens, the last thing he wanted was some chubby pubescent tagging along. It bummed me out a bit.

Then came the time when it was revealed that my grandfather on that side of the family was a horrendous sleazebag. This caused a bit of a rift. Brenda was halfway in denial about it (did she forget that it's why she left home & eloped at 16?), and Mom was torn up because she's also a victim, and because he did the same thing to my sister (her confession about it six months after the fact was what brought the rift on).

People chose sides and Mom was caught in the middle. She hated what happened, but she wasn't going to deny herself her family.

When gramps died a few years ago, I went to visit Grandma. It was pretty sad. We didn't know what to say to each other. She'd since moved in with Brenda. I saw the rest of the family for the first time in a very long time last Christmas. People were older, taller, shorter, wider, etc, but generally the same.

I didn't miss much, but I missed a lot.

When she passes, the biggest concern is where Grandma is going to go. If uncle Bill has the will to keep living and take care of his mother in law, then fine. Mom takes turns with the other siblings each week anyway. But if he kicks off, too, that leaves a lot hanging in the air.

So everyone's just trying to figure out what to do.

*Edit, 09/19/06 9:30 PM:

She died last night, before I even typed this out. Mom says everyone is kind of peaceful and relieved.